A letter to my forgotten best friend...

Dear Advil~

I cannot explain to you how I have missed you so much. Only 72 more days to go and we will be reunited and it will feel SO good! I plan on taking you to the hospital with me and taking you as soon as baby Kelley enters this world. If I only have you by my side, I will be a happy girl. Since my husband was left dumbfounded by the whole birthing process last time, you actually may be more support then he was! You will hold my hand and tell me it will be ok, won't you. You will tell me that you can't imagine the kind of pain I must be in and ask me if I am some kind of superhero...even after I have the epidural. You will tell me that I can get through the labor and delivery because you will be there waiting for me after it is over. While everyone is looking at the beautiful baby, I will be begging asking for a fountain Dr. Pepper so I can take FOUR of my bestest friends in the whole wide world! Oh, Advil, I have called out for you so many times and respected your ability to stay away when I needed you so much. Like last night, you were searched for and no where to be found...thank goodness or I would have taken you! My baby thanks for you being "lost". Of all the things that pregnancy has restricted me from, you are by far the hardest to handle. Don't you worry, little green liquid filled wonderfulness. You will be joining me daily come June. I can't wait to have our relationship back. I will make a promise to you...that there are no more 9 month periods where we are forced to stay apart. I know it is just as hard on you(the company's stock plummeted when I stopped taking you...for that I will make it up to you.). Just know I think about you several times a day and you will never be replaced permanently. Tylenol doesn't do shit for me. You are truly a girls best friend!! Seriously...

Another feel sorry for me post...

This week has been ridiculous. This is a post about my 10 year old going on 18 year old baby girl. This past Friday, she had "the talk" at school. You know the one. Where they take all the boys out to play kickball and the girls have to watch a movie about a mom and daughter talking about getting periods. The one I saw had a mom making pancakes in the shape of a woman's reproductive organs. I don't think I ate pancakes for years after that. Makayla's traumatizing moment was when they demonstrated how to insert a tampon on a mannequin. She said that she is NOT going to get her period and she is NOT going to put "that thing" "there". Amen sista. If only we could control that!

She also has junior high school cheerleading tryouts this week. Insert me anxiously sighing and heart racing! I am not ready for this. I don't think she is ready either. Or maybe it is just me and my insecurities that make it seem she is not ready. Ok, it is completely me! I will have a newborn, a toddler and a junior high school student in only a couple months! Breathe, breathe, breathe.

She still offers some moments that just make us laugh. You know when she isn't being sassy and talking back. When I picked her up last night, she was talking to a girl. I asked if she just met her that day. Here is our convo...
Her: Mom, that is Madison M
Me: Who is that
Her: From my class at school
Me: (I am not racist. We go to a very small school and there is only one class per grade. I simply thought I knew all the kids in her class.) The black girl?
Her: (Looking at me like she is disgusted with what I just said) You mean chocolate (said with an attitude)

I love that she thinks of skin color as a flavor. Not sure if that is "right" but for right now, I think it is perfect!

As soon as my precious baby is here, I am going to start drinking wine....heavily. Seriously...

I. Was. Wrong.

Did you feel the earth rumble when I typed those words out? Yes, that is me admitting I was wrong. I even apologized! It all started last Monday night when my husband and I fought over who was going to take Magdelicious to parent/tot class at the gym KayKay cheers for. We were actually fighting because we both wanted to take her. So I let him win and take her. I figured he is going to be in the field soon and I will welcome the help!

It took everything I had to stay in the parents viewing area and not go switch places with him. He was sweating and I didn't understand why. He was simply moving the lil one from station to station. He also let her run off and didn't try to get her back to her station. I guess I am more of a control freak then I thought. So I made fun of him and grilled him on why he was sweating, why he didn't have more control over her and why he didn't make her do more. I will take this time to remind you that she just turned 19 months last week.

Well, today I ate my words and took back everything I said to him last week. I attended lil M's class with her and it was the longest 35 minutes ever. Oh and her class is 45 minutes long, EJ finished the last 10 minutes with her. Yes, I tagged him in when I couldn't hold my need to pee any longer. And I didn't go back! Magdelicious has a mind of her own, very strong willed. She tested my patience and then some. KayKay had her cheerleading practice at the same time and that didn't help with keeping lil M's attention on her own class. I was more frustrated that the teacher expected a 19 month old to be able to understand and obey every command. I maybe expected to much out of the class or too much out of my daughter. But the most important thing is that she loves the class and has fun even with her mean old mom making her stay at her station.

Dad is taking her next week. And hopefully the next one after that. Seriously...

Lesson learned...don't use your dentures as a weapon!

A gentleman(term used loosely) came into the office yesterday and asked Dr. Wonderful if he could fix his denture. Dr. W looked at them and told him he could. He tried explaining how his top denture could have cracked like it did, giving him all the scenarios. Well the guy stopped him and said "oh no, I took them out and threw them at her(pointing to the woman with him) and she stepped on them". I swear to you, word for word that is what he said. The woman, just smiled. Dr. W told him it would take him a couple hours to get them fixed and asked if they could come back later for them. He said that wouldn't be a problem. He had to go to court and that would take a while. Really folks, that was the highlight of my day! I giggled all day thinking of how that scene must have played out! Seriously...