Oh Makayla

Makayla left me a note this morning. It read "half of the small plates are gone and the big plates are gone".
My dear beautiful daughter, where have I gone wrong. You don't have many chores around the house. I do on a regular basis ask that you empty and reload the dishwasher. Well, you did that last night. You loaded the dishes into the dishwasher and you started the said dishwasher.
As soon as I got the note, I opened the dishwasher, and what do you know, I found the dishes. I thought surely you were joking. When you got home from school, after your "story", I asked you about the dishes. You said you thought someone came in and stole them. Really? Seriously? You thought someone came in and stole all of our big plates and only half of the small plates. Why didn't they steal the silverware too, or the bowls? Sometimes I wonder about you!! Seriously...

A letter to the mean girls...

Here is another letter. Not to my toe this time, to my daughters classmates that I have named "the mean girls". Not always mean, but always looking for a situation to be mean. Here goes it.

Dear Mean Girls,
While I understand that your school has a "wide variety" of students, being so small means that there is only one class per grade, same kids every year. I always dreaded summer because you weren't guaranteed who would be in your class the following year. You girls are lucky and unlucky all at the same time. Not having the class change makes for a big bowl of nastiness. You all have been together for the last 5 years. That is plenty of time to know how to piss each other off. You girls do that TOO often!! Tonight my daughter, your so called friend, came home and told me she had a story to tell me. I dread her stories. I dread them because it always involves one of you being a little witch and shows me how mean spirited you girls can be.

Makayla: R and A told me today that I am adopted.
Me: WHAT!!!
Makayla: They told me that B's mom told them I was adopted because I don't look like you or dad.
Me: Um, hello, you look just like me but with lighter hair. I have never even had a conversation with B's mom.
Makayla: They also said that dad is my step dad, not my real dad.
Me: Your dad is in all ways possible your "real" dad. You know that Dan is your dad too, but Dad is your "real" dad. You can tell them tomorrow that you are sorry that there lives are so boring that all they can think about is you and your dad. Thank them for being so interested in you and if they would like to know more, wait for the book. It is none of their business what happens in our home and our lives.

So, mean girls, please mind your own business. I know that being 9/10 years old is a curious time. I get that. However, you seem to dwell on who you can pick on next, who isn't up to "your standards". Why not give being nice to everyone a shot. Heck, you can start small and just keep your damn mouths shut if you don't have anything nice to say. I have had to have so many conversations with my daughter to make things better from something you girls said that she couldn't understand a friend would say. I really do feel sorry for you all. Your homes cannot be very stable with the way your behavior and actions are at school. I can over look some casual cattiness. I am not oblivious to "normal" kids behavior. I am sure that my own daughter has been mean on occasions too. I always tell her to be nice to everyone so no one has a reason to be mean to her. I am pleading with you mean girls....BE NICE!!!! Seriously...

Randomness

I have been in a funk lately. Really. I don't like to get out of my pj's. That isn't really new though. I have been sneaking in a Dr. Pepper here and there...never more then one in a day. I usually don't finish a can either. That is called rationalizing something you are doing that makes you feel guilty. Clearly. Magdelicious is seriously going to be the end of me. She is SOOO strong willed, determined, bull headed, stubborn, sassy, too smart for her own good, and oh so cute while being all the above. She already ignores us, especially Kaylor. Oh man does that irritate Kaylor. She won't lay still for a diaper change, Maggers, not Kaylor!! As soon as you put her down, she is off and crawling to the stairs, looking back at you to see if you are coming to get her. She is a trying little girl and when she isn't trying to piss us off she is so much fun. Watching her sleep is my favorite thing to do. She is so peaceful and I imagine all the ways that she isn't. Calm, content, quiet, timid, snuggler. At least not during her awake hours. Then there is Kaylor. She is sooo NOSY!! I can be talking to someone on the phone while she is upstairs in her room. She comes down and asks who it is, what did they say, why did I say that, all while I am on the phone still!!!! Come on. I know, she must get that from her dad!! :) She is just your typical almost 10 year old. She is trying to be older than she is yet at times wanting so badly to be younger. I remember being 10, I didn't like it one bit. I feel her pain. Really. Doesn't mean I am going to cut her any slack. So that is why I am in a funk, I think. Oh yeah and my husband is busy working again, farming is a hard lifestyle adjustment. Just when you get used to them being around, poof, they are gone again. I suppose one of these times I may enjoy it. Probably after the kids are in college but I guess that gives me something to look forward to. Well, I will stop rambling and go lay in bed for a few hours stewing on why I can't fall asleep. Seriously....

Little toe, I really need you

This is to my little toe:

Dear little toe on my left foot-
I am sorry that you are hurting today. I feel your pain and wish I could take it away. Seriously, I want this pain gone. Two days ago, I took you to the doctor and had them take off the piece of character that made you different. You always got more of my attention then any other toe because of that weird looking mole you sprouted a couple years ago. Well I have some confessions to make to you.
I kinda liked the mole, although the doctor didn't. I had thought, "hmm, who else has a parallelogram shaped mole on there little toe?" I like being different as I can tell you did too.
I always took you and little toe on my right foot for granted. I always wondered why God gave me the feet He did. I assumed God didn't want me wearing flip flops. That hasn't stopped me yet. I let you little left toe and you little right toe hang on for dear life onto the side of the flip flop. You guys are clutching the shoe for dear life and I am ignoring you. I know, I am selfish and will not give up my flip flops!!
I always have you toes painted in hopes to distract attention away from the uncuteness that you toes have. Yes, I admit it, all of you toes are not cute. Why do you all have to be the same length. It is unique, yes, but not attractive.
Well today I apologize for assuming that you don't have a purpose. I need you for balance and gripping and picking up things, even though all you toes have to be the shortest toes on record. Little toe on my left foot, forgive me for scarring you for life and taking away your uniqueness. I hope you heal soon and we can continue our love/hate relationship. I will give you a break from hanging on for dear life, as you deserve it for what you have been through. I will not wear flip flops until you are strong enough to resume your position!!
Love, Me
Seriously....

Expiration dates are important!!!

So, in an effort to coerce some warm weather our way we decided to have BLT's tonight for dinner. Nothing screams summer more then BLT's, especially with home grown tomato's!! My husband and daughter LOVE bacon so for the three of us 1 pound is not enough. One package was new and the other was...not. As a matter of fact the expiration date was...."use by Nov. 28, 2008". Clearly we should not have used it. This was our conversation.

Him "those dates mean sell by"
Me "uh, really, because USE by is kinda different then SELL by and this clearly states USE by Nov. 2008. It isn't even the same year we are in!"
Him "those are just guidelines"

You think they maybe put dates on there for a reason?! I understand if it was Dec. 08, and I probably wouldn't think twice but the bacon was almost 5 months expired!!!
So you are probably wondering what happens next. I will let you all know as soon as I can stay out of the bathroom long enough to tell you!!!!! Gotta go. Seriously...

Mother Of The Year...I Am Not!!

Oh my goodness, I feel like we are the worst parents ever. Magdelicious has not slept well in a few nights. Getting up crying and wanting Dad to hold her to get her back to sleep. Last night she ended up in our bed because, well, clearly I was just too damn tired to keep getting up and holding her until she went back to sleep(thanks dear husband for training her on that!). Tonight, tonight was going to be our night! We, the parents, were taking back our sleep. Well it took us one hour of going in every 10 minutes to lay her back down and give her the paci. She sits up and then can't/won't lay back down. Finally, she was quiet. EJ went in to make sure she was ok. Well, sniffle~sniffle, she was asleep sitting up leaning her head against the crib. Heart literally breaking, it gets worse. She is ever so quietly sobbing still, asleep. I wanted to scoop her up and bring her to bed with us. I literally had chest pains as I felt my heart breaking for imagining how sad she must have felt and looked! I hope she forgives us and doesn't ignore me all day tomorrow. She is a smart cookie and has already figured us out or so she thought. I hope this episode doesn't "do her in" and scar her for life. It sure has scarred me! Please my precious darling, smile at me when you see me tomorrow. We do this only because we love you!!! Seriously...

welcom to Illinois...

Seriously...

Don't get me wrong...

Seriously, I had a rough day. I actually feel bad saying that because I am lucky enough to stay home with my precious for now. But, having said that, today was tough. If I were asked to report back to work tomorrow, I would have said YES. I would have said it as it is written, boldly. I felt like I had an 8 month old with colic. She literally screamed for 1 hour and 14 minutes. Yes I know that for sure. I always give her 5 minutes of hard crying before I go in to check on her so I check the clock. Well, she just wasn't happy today. It may have been because we went to get my tires changed, oil rotated. I actually said it like this to everyone I talked to today!!:) Well I didn't go to one of those 10 minute oil change place. I should have. If I didn't have free tire rotation from a certain place I would have left. I didn't realize that it takes 45 minutes to change oil/rotate tires and there reasoning was "unlike those 10 minute places, we lift the car and check everything". Really?!?! I won't get into that right now. During the hour and a half waiting, since there was a car in front of mine, I had to entertain aforementioned precious. Well lets just say we ran out of snacks and the whole front of her was soaking wet from giving her drinks of water from a Styrofoam cup. We even went and touched tires just for fun. EWWW. So that was maybe not good to go through all the snacks. It gets worse. We go visit an elderly lady in a nursing home and to keep aforementioned precious quiet for the roommate that didn't look too friendly, we went through half the snacks that I restocked. Clearly, I am one of those moms that worries too much about having my child disturb others in public. I need to get over it!! So from about 1pm til she went to bed, precious was a NIGHTMARE!!! I would maybe go as far as saying that she was slightly overfed on snacks. Not that I am giving her the benefit of the doubt, she was just straight up CRANKY today and that of course made momma very cranky. You know the saying "if mommas not happy, nobodies happy"!! Seriously...

Almost peed my pants...

Makayla and I went to see a movie today. Paul Blart Mall Cop. Funny, not buy it when it comes out funny but cute funny. Makayla laughed way more then I did, so it was kid funny. Well there was maybe 10 of us in the theatre. Right as the movie was starting this family came in, kind of loud, like maybe they didn't remember they were in public. I even will go as far as saying that they don't get out much. Well the dad wanted to sit up high, the daughter just wanted to groan and the mom, well the mom may have been lost. When the dad finally settled on where they were sitting, the mom declared to the whole theatre that she was going to get popcorn. Well when she got back she must have been a little disoriented. Granted, it is hard to go from a lighted room to the dark. She must have been sure there were stairs at the edge of the seats. Well, there weren't. I thought she had maybe decided to sit down in the handicap(I will leave that one alone!) seat right in front of the "higher" section which is where we all were sitting. No, she was pretty sure there was a staircase there before. She literally tried to walk up the seat. Yes, she tried numerous times to "walk", as in putting her foot onto the folded up seat. I of course was shaking, laughing so hard(I wish I had my camera to take a picture, you had to see the family to really get an understanding.). Makayla was oblivious as she was actually watching the movie. Oh Bloomington/Normal, you never let me down!!! Seriously...

Miley....go away

So here we are watching the Country Music Awards and all we keep hearing as they go to commercial breaks..."Coming up Miley Cyrus preforms". Ugh someone tell me when she will go away. Seriously. Yes, many of you will remind me how gaga Makayla and I(by default, we do anything for our children) went over Hannah Montana and how persistent I was and got us on Oprah. Well, it has worn off, at least for me. I am SOOO over her. I think she is taking her "idol" status and letting it go to her head. Here is my advice to her. Clearly, she will listen to me.
1. Stop taking pictures of yourself.
2. In reference to #1...keep your clothes on or at least do us a favor and dress for your age, you have little girls watching and wanting to be you.
3. Instead of becoming too big for your britches, remember your dads career and know it can all be gone in a second. You don't hear Achy Breaky Heart being played anymore. Clearly.
4. Take responsibility for your actions. Apologize to the Asian community and stop making excuses.
5. Little girls, tweens, and teens look up to you(for whatever reason), living with your 20 year old boyfriend is NOT cool. Your parents are idiots for letting that happen.
6. If you want to be treated like an adult, act like one.
I really liked her when we met her on Oprah, I did. She was down to earth and talked to the girls during commercial breaks. Even Makayla thinks she is over the top now.
Okay so that is enough of me Miley hating. Seriously...

My Life. In Pictures.

Happy Friday!!!!

Today is the last day for the My Life. In Pictures. So sad to be done.

Today we are to post something old. So here is my Old:

This is an "old" grain bin. I love how you can see all the rusty old screws. It is amazing that this bin holds so much weight and all that is to show for it is rusty screws. You can't beat the clouds going over either. I love trying to see things like no one else. This angle is not something my husband, being a farmer, sees as he is climbing that ladder!! Until the next challenge....enjoy!

My Life. In Pictures

My Life. In Pictures
Amber over at Everything Except The Grill has decided to do a picture a day this week starting tomorrow.

Here are the rules:

Monday- Something new

Tuesday- Something on your table

Wednesday- The view from your front door

Thursday- Something you do each day

Friday- Something old

So today is Something you do each day. This was a lot tougher then I thought it would be. Yes we all do lots of things each day but how do you make mundane things seem exciting and unique!! Well...I am still trying to figure this out. I really wanted to keep it to one picture, more of a challenge for me that way. Well today I kinda cheated. I took and will post only one picture. Just because there is a picture IN my picture does not make me a cheater!!!

I love being the one to see this every morning. She isn't usually this happy but while she was, I was documenting it. I too, like some of you, love POP(or soda for you southerners)!!! I decided that I want to be healthier so I switched to water. It is very hard as I DO not like water, I know I should but I don't. So this is my everyday. I feel bad leaving my other daughter out of the picture but all we do is argue and how do you put that on film!!! Seriously...

Oh Makayla

Today Makayla was being super annoying with her April Fools Day jokes. This afternoon went something like this with her 9 year old humor. This went on and on and on. She kept saying something to me and then with EJ in the same room going to him and repeating it. Thank goodness it only happens once a year!

Makayla~"Mom, you have something on your head"
Me~"what?"
Makayla~"April Fools"

Makayla~"Ugh, Maggie stinks, I think she pooped"
Me~"go change her"
Makayla~"April Fools" (she did this about 10 times)

Makayla~"Dad, you have something on your head"
EJ~"Makayla, you just said the same thing to your mom"
Makayla~"April Fools"
EJ~"Go to bed"
EJ~"I am so glad I don't have to hear that for 365 more days"

Me~"This is NOT an April Fools Day joke, you are going to have another brother or sister!!"
Makayla~"OH NO, No way, you better not!"
Me~"Seriously"
Makayla~(to Maggie)"Do not let them have another one" (Like Maggie has anything to do with it)

I left it at that, let her stew in it for awhile!!

My Life. In Pictures.

My Life. In Pictures
Amber over at Everything Except The Grill has decided to do a picture a day this week starting tomorrow.

Here are the rules:

Monday- Something new

Tuesday- Something on your table

Wednesday- The view from your front door

Thursday- Something you do each day

Friday- Something old

This isn't too exciting. When the weather gets nicer we will have this pasture full of cows!!! I can't wait. I could do without the flys that come with the cows but having a pasture this pretty, again, once it is nice out, is fantabulous. We built this on my husbands farm ground so we need to do some major landscaping still. I couldn't ask for a nicer view!!